First, place a deep-sided 12-inch skillet or frypan on the stove top, pour in enough of the oil so that it fills the pan about a third of the way up, and crank up the fire. Ideally, you want to heat the oil to about 375 degrees (actually, you’ll fry at 350, but since the temperature will drop when you put in the fish fillets, you need to "overheat" the pan to start).

Then while the oil is coming to heat, begin "planking" the fillets. To accomplish this you’ll need a very sharp knife. What you want to do is "slice" each fillet laterally (or horizontally) so that you end up with three "very thin lengthwise slices." When they’ve been cut, return each slice to a pan of ice cold water to await cooking.

Now when you’re ready to eat, take the fillets from the water and prepare them for frying. Of course, you probably have been told dozens of ways you can do this, but the proper way is to take wet fillets (remember, to keep them ultra-fresh they also need to be stored in the refrigerator in a pan of cold water), lightly shake off the excess water, and meticulously dredge them in a pan of the fish fry, being careful to thoroughly coat them all over.

Afterwards, immediately place the fillets—so that they’re not touching!—on a sheet of waxed paper and allow them to "rest" on the paper for at least two to three minutes so that (1) the ingredients in the fish fry adhere to the fillets and (2) so that the coating doesn’t fall off in the hot oil.

When your oil is ready, ease the fillets into the pan one at a time, but don’t overcrowd them—give them room to fry. At the correct temperature, if the fillets are fried for about 2 to 3 minutes on each side they will come out perfect every time, tender-flaky on the inside yet with the most incredible crispiness on the outside. They will also be a luscious shade of golden-brown and will be almost totally greaseless.

When they’re done frying, all that’s left is to place them on a couple of layers of absorbent paper towels (or on a wire rack) to drain. —and there’s no disputing the point: for fried fish to be truly gourmet, especially fish done this way, it should be eaten the moment it comes out of the frypan. So be sure to tell your invited dinner guests to be standing close by with plate in hand once the frying starts. You won’t believe the difference it’ll make!

So what do you serve with trout planks? Almost anything goes with ‘em, but I personally like a creamy baked potato loaded with melted butter and sour cream, sprinkled with cracked black pepper, and topped with bacon bits and green onions, plus an ear of "right-out-the-boil" buttered corn on the cob, slathered in melted butter, and seasoned with Frank Davis Sprinkling Spice.