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Well here
we are y'all. It's been a trying journey that has both expanded my culinary
horizons and my waistlines. From the deep fried to the fast food, this burger
search was well worth the effort. Instead of a belt scale I'm gonna break it
down Top 10 style… well actually Top 7… but you know what I mean.
And for all y'all out there whose favorite joint I didn't make it to, all I
can say is, "Be patient." This has been one of the most entertaining
quests yet, and I'm bound to do another one real soon.
Enjoy.
# 7 - Bud's Broiler
Bud's is Bud's and this local fast food joint rarely strays from a solid, consistent
burger. Just make sure you remember your number… it's easier that way.
"…Meat, lettuce, tomato, pickles and mustard are the building blocks.
This sets the table with a thin, but well-flavored burger patty, along with
the standard fixins. To get to a #6, you throw in some grated cheddar cheese.
This here is the key to any delicious Bud's burger. The mounds of cheddar add
a pop to what would be a relatively ordinary sandwich, giving it needed bulk.
But where this burger really sets itself apart is the addition of the hickory
sauce. The sweet, smoky sauce is far from delicate, but its hammer is softened
as it blends with the cheese, meat and bun. The overall effect is a distinct,
char-grilled taste that is Bud's claim to fame…"
# 6 - Ye Olde College Inn
This was the only cheeseburger po-boy of the bunch, and while the patty had
a solid grilled taste, the soft French was a letdown. However, College Inn wins
the side item contest by a mile with perhaps the best onion rings in town.
"…There was an initial strike because I noticed before that bad boy
even hit the table that the bread was not toasted. How many times do I have
to tell 'em, toast is the way to go. Not only does it add so much to the flavor
of the bread, it provides a satisfying crunch, plus much needed stability when
battling juicy burger patties. But where the bread was lacking, the rest of
the burger filled in nicely. With thicker than normal patties, this burger po-boy
brought some heft, and the seasoned beef had a respectable grilled flavoring.
The real star of this meal however was the onion rings. I have absolutely no
reservations about dubbing these glistening hoops of flaky delight the most
outstanding rings that have ever crossed these lips. I can promise you the light,
yet crisp batter on these freshly fried rings will bring you back even if the
burger is not a superstar…"
# 5 - Tucker's Tavern
The home of the "deep-fried burger", Tucker's pulled in points for
originality and portion size. Only problem was, the unique ingredient list lost
its original flavor to the overpowering burger.
"…According to our waitress, the burgers are assembled by taking two
quarter-pound patties, piling the stuffing in-between, then battering and frying
'em. This leads to a distinct crunchy covering on the burger that seals in the
flavor (and heat), but also maintains the structural integrity of the patty
despite its heft. The bun however was untoasted, and in the case of The Big
Cajun, soaked in hot sauce, which led to a reversal of the usual sloppy burger/sturdy
bun scenario. (Believe me, when you've had as many burgers as I've had, you
tend to notice such things.) As far as the actual flavor of the burger, it was
quite tasty. The cheeses were excellent additions to the well-seasoned patty.
But I was disappointed with the sausage and the bacon. They lost their identity
to the overwhelming personality of the burger, and they ended up tasting like
burger-flavored bacon and burger-flavored sausage..."
# 4 - The Times Bar and Grill
With the best toasted bun on the list, the Times and the next two slots were
a really tough call. The thick, juicy patty was wonderfully topped with oodles
of mushrooms and cheese. What left this on the short end of the following trio
were the sides, which were some of the worst I tried.
"…There's just somethin' about that crisp, firm bun hoisting the weight
of a scrumptiously seasoned burger patty that really completes the equation
for me. Don't believe it? Well, head on over to Slidell and check out the Times
burger and tell me toastin' isn't the way to go. I went with a medium-rare version
of the Times' Swiss burger. Covered in loads of Swiss cheese and mushrooms,
this hearty beef patty sang with authentic grilled flavor prepared at the exact
temperature I requested. Then there was the bun. This crunchy, yet yielding
blanket of bread was the quintessential burger bun. The combination of the mouth-watering
meat and crisp bread made for hamburger heaven. That trip to celestial heights
was however derailed just a tad when I sampled some of the side items The Times
had to offer. Out of the sweet potato fries, fried pickles and onion rings,
I'd have to give a hesitant nod to the onion rings, only because the other two
were either too soggy or too salty…"
#
3 - N'Tini's
The most gourmet option on the hunt, N'Tini's was a pleasant surprise. The addition
of pork into the ground sirloin, along with the spicy bun, makes for an upper-crust
take on the classic hamburger.
"…The burger itself was a thick, monster of a patty that had a unique,
somewhat spicy taste along with the added punch of the ground pork. The rich
burger flavor, combined with the jalapenos in the bread and the pepperjack cheese
made for a very tasty treat. Speaking of treats, the side that came with this
burger was the perfect sweet complement to all that fire. A baked sweet potato
topped with butter and a cinnamon dusting was this burger's sidekick and the
creamy sweet potato eased any burn that came from the burger's heat. While I
do usually crave the massive loaded baked potato, this was a welcome change
to the dining experience…"
# 2 - Port of Call
The granddaddy of 'em all, Port of Call has been a legendary fixture on the
outskirts of the Quarter. If you haven't been in a while, treat yourself to
the massive burger and 'tater combo that few can put down in one sitting.
"Thick, juicy and smothered in a load of toppings, the burger at Port of
Call is quite a sight. I get mine medium rare, dressed with shredded cheddar
cheese and mushrooms. The lettuce and tomato are crisp, the cheese sharp and
the mushrooms o' so delicious. But the real joy comes from taking just a moment
to behold a truly beautiful creation just before you dive in and it begins to
disintegrate in your hands. Here's a couple of things that stood out: 1) The
meat was cooked exactly as I asked, not too pink and not too brown 2) The velvety
smoothness of those mushrooms mixed with the meat made for a head swimming taste
sensation 3) Eat the burger first, and eat it fast. When I said it disintegrates
in your hand I wasn't lying. The lack of a toasted bun keeps this thing from
holding up as well as it should (and the pound of toppings doesn't help either)."
#1 - And the winner … Ruby Red's
This blast from the past could have won on nostalgia alone, but the burger was
perfect. Not too big, not too small, the grilled taste is allowed to shine,
and the steak fries ain't to shabby either.
"At first glance, this burger looks as if it should be the poster child
for the prototypical hamburger. Seriously, the mounds of grated cheddar sit
high above a "not too thin-not too thick" patty, all of which is garnished
with crisp lettuce tomato and onions. Fear not though, this is not just a beauty
contest. This Miss America's got the answer to world peace as well as a great
smile. Just before that first bite, you draw in the aroma through your nostrils
and trigger your salivary glands for what is to be burger bliss. Then there's
the contact when you actually taste the perfect blend of well seasoned beef
and sharp cheddar. They even managed to toast the bun a little, adding to the
support and holding everything together. As far as sides go, the steak fries
are fat and crisp, even if you wisely decide to add some cheese. And if that
isn't enough, don't forget you've always got all the peanuts you can eat."
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